Roundin' up this Rodeo

So we (my husband and his job) figured out we are probably moving to Texas here shortly. I really didn't want to move there.. I wanted to be closer to our family, but in this insane lifestyle we have to look at every time we move.. every place we move as an opportunity or adventure. For me, that can be really hard to do. I want to go where I want, when I want. I've never really had much of a say so in things growing up and now I find myself in that same position as an adult. If I want to live with my husband I am at the mercy of his job. This can be quite disarming and hard to cope with when you are a free spirit and desire a peaceful and artistic life. Then being thrust into this very militant lifestyle can suck the creativity and whimiscal nature from a person who must conform for her husband's job. It's really tough and sometimes I feel like I suck at being a wife and mother, then other times I think.. he's damn lucky to have me for putting up with all these things I never wanted or asked for in my life. I could have seen myself painting on the streets of Paris free from responsibility, albeit free from money in that scenario as well. However, the warmth of family life I have now I would have had to find elsewhere. I feel like my path in life is so fluid.. not concrete, it's just a matter of directing the currents down the path I want to travel with the given nooks, rocks and crevices I've been handed to work with. It's just more of a challenge for me to express who I am and lead the life I desire while following my husband on his attempts to provide for our family. So as we get ready to pack and move before or after Christmas.. I guess I'll be moving rocks in order to find that path that's been calling my name so long.. that magical path where reality and dreams will align for me. I don't know how near or far I am from reaching my dreams, but I know that as an artist at heart, I can't ever stop trying. Closing the book on Arizona soon and about to read what's in store for me in Texas. Sweet dreams Cowfolk..

My funny girl and me.. oh what does the future hold? Let it be grande! :)